Logistical Salvation

Kourtney and Kim Take New York Season 2 premiered last night and oh how sweet it is.  The Kardashian Family (especially Kim) will be looking for ALL SORTS of PR after meeting with considerable public backlash regarding Kim’s divorce to obscure athlete and general idiot Kris Humphries.  The family of course has since launched a damage-control campaign, the cornerstone of which will be Kourtney and Kim take New York.  According to sources the show will be heavily portraying Kris (Humphries) as a villain, as Kris (Jenner) is an executive producer of the show itself and therefore can doctor it’s content however she wants.  God forbid after making 18 million dollars off of the wedding Kim couldn’t even suffer through more than 72 days of a bad marriage.  Whereas most people suffer through a bad marriage their entire lives.  For free.  If someone offered you 18 million to marry an idiot would you do it?  Of course you would.  Let’s be honest.  All you have to do is ignore everything he/she says.  With 18 million you could even buy them a separate house and you wouldn’t even have to ever say a single word to them.  After typing Kim as a Promoter and being presented with some pretty solid arguments to the contrary let’s take a closer and more in-depth look at Kim Kardashian and her dear and beloved sister Kourtney Kardashian.

Kimberly Noel Kardashian was born October 21 1980 the daughter of attorney Robert Kardashian and his wife Kris Kardashian.  Her father was of Armenian descent, her mother Dutch-Scottish.  Kim led a pretty standard young Los Angeles socialite life until tragedy struck and her father died of esophageal cancer in 2003 at the age of 59.  Kim is a self-described obsessive-compulsive neat freak and is actually very shy and timid in large groups.  While much of her behavior comes off as being a Promoter, this is no doubt through the guidance of her overbearing and strong-willed Promoter Artisan mother Kris Jenner.  Indeed Kim has essentially done exactly what she has been told, in order for Kris to create an ’empire’ with.  Kim cares deeply about her family, and takes great pride in protecting the health and welfare of those she cares about.  Self-admittedly uptight, extremely hard-working, actually quite shy, and very loving of her family Kim Kardashian is undoubtedly a Protector Guardian.

Kourtney Mary Kardashian was born of the same ilk of her dear sister a year earlier.  The oldest of the Kardashian children, Kourtney was the one who kept them all in line.  Indeed Kourtney is the most serious of all the Kardashian kids, and can sometimes seem cold and unforgiving.  Earnest, attentive, dedicated, and highly strict and thorough, Kourtney Kardashian is undoubtedly an Inspector Guardian.  Certainly Kourtney can seem like a downright b*tch sometimes, but let’s not hold it against her.

Artisan parents have little or no difficulty rearing Guardian children.  They enjoy encouraging their Guardian children to get into all sorts of sports and arts and adventures, hoping to help loosen them up and show them that life is for living here and now.  With such modeling on how to have fun Guardian children can overcome their natural caution and seriousness, and can thrive both at home and school.  There is a danger that highly aggressive Artisan parents can communicate dissatisfaction with their Guardian child’s over concerned attitude, letting it be known that they aren’t happy with a goody-goody child of either gender—teasing them about being a mama’s boy or a little pris.  If SP parents expect (or demand) boldness and impetuosity from their SJ children, they will only frighten or inhibit them, and teach them they are a failure.  Fortunately, it is unusual for both parents to be Artisans, and quite usual for the other parent to be a Guardian.  So the Guardian child often has the best of both worlds: someone to show the way to joy, and someone to show the way of duty.  Please Understand Me II, p. 277

Portraying Kris (Humphries) as a villain seems to be right on schedule, as the first episode ends with him moving out.  Kourtney and Kim take New York airs every Sunday @ 10/9c on the E! network.

Quote1.png I love my sisters.  Kourtney is the most loyal and responsible person I know and Khloe definitely has the biggest heart.Quote2.png

Kim Kardashian

Tactical Humility

Taylor Swift took home three trophies at the 39th Annual American Music Awards including the top honor Artist of the Year.  I know, right?  What a bunch of idiots.  It was the second time in three years she had been given the AMA’s top honor, and the fourth year in a row she’s won Favorite Country Album.  Taylor emphasized the fact that she did not expect to win the Artist of the Year Award and I think it’s safe to say that nobody did.  There was obviously some sort of huge mix-up and they just rolled with it.  Nicki Minaj was also a big winner, while Katy Perry was honored with a special award for being the first woman in history to have five #1 singles from the same album (Teenage Dream).  David Hasselhoff brang his idiocy to the table with an appearance in the finale performance by LMFAO.  On winning Taylor commented “this is just crazy” and “I really can’t believe that it happened”.  Neither can we Taylor.  Neither can we.  The “award darling” went three for three at the AMA’s and is starting to be the target of criticism for continually acting overwhelmingly surprised during her acceptance speeches.  We get it Taylor.  You’re a good songwriter.  Get over it.  Joking aside Taylor Swift is a very talented and humble artist so let’s go ahead and take a look at T Swizzle a.k.a. Tay Tay fo Shay Shay.

Taylor Alison Swift was born on a christmas-tree farm in an obscure town in Pennsylvania, and since early childhood has showed an exceptional talent for poetry, music, and writing.  Her artistic talents blossomed quite early, as she won a national poetry contest in the fourth grade, and wrote a 350-page novel at the age of 12.  After learning to play the guitar, Taylor had found her passion and started devoting most of her time to singing and songwriting.  Taylor admittedly got picked on in school, and used songwriting to express her emotions as an outlet for the pain of not fitting in.  After her family moved to Nashville, Tennessee, Taylor was able to display her talents and quickly became recognized.  Her breakout single “Tim Mcgraw” was the first of many hits, while “Love Story” subsequently shoved her into the national spotlight.  Highly emotional, musically harmonic, adorably sensitive and gracefully timid Taylor Swift is undoubtedly a Composer Artisan.  Composers (like Taylor) “prefer to have their fingers on their compositional tools and through them feel the pulse of life”.  Indeed Taylor speaks almost exclusively through her music, as when Composers “find a medium of expression, some art form, then they will express their character quite eloquently via that medium”.

“Although Composers often put long, lonely hours into their compositions, we must not assume that they are working on their art in the sense of careful planning and dutiful execution.  On close observation, ISFPs prove to be just as impulsive as other Artisans.  Indeed, they covet their impulses and see them as the center of their lives.  They do not wait to act or to consider their moves, for to wait is to see their impulse wither and die; rather, they live intensely in the here and now, and as gracefully as possible, with little or no planning or preparation.  Submergence in their artistry is not preparation for something later, and neither is it artful play, such as Crafters engage in with their tools.  Composers are seized by the act of artistic composition, as if caught up in a whirlwind.  The act is their master, not the reverse, and, in a sense, the doing is elicited by the action itself.  ISFPs paint or sculpt, they dance or skate, they write melodies or recipes—or whatever—simply because they must.  They climb the mountain because it is there.”  Please Understand Me II, p. 73

Taylor‘s newest album Speak Now was released October 25th and is available on iTunes.

Quote1.png People haven’t always been there for me but music always has.Quote2.png

Taylor Swift

A Candle in the Wind

And it seems to me you lived your life
Like a candle in the wind.
Never knowing who to cling to
When the rain set in.
I´d have liked to have known you
But I was just a kid.
Your candle burned out long before
Your legend ever did.

Candle in the Wind,  Elton John & Bernie Taupin

She is an icon of modern culture.  A legend.

She had been in foster care most of her childhood.  She wasn’t wanted, her mother was too unreliable to take care of her.  She was convinced to marry young for that way her guardians could go to Florida without her.

“My marriage didn’t make me sad, but it didn’t make me happy either. My husband and I hardly spoke to each other. This wasn’t because we were angry. We had nothing to say. I was dying of boredom.”

Continue reading A Candle in the Wind

Brutal Tacticians

The Dark Knight Rises wrapped principal photography in New York last week and in a recent interview with Empire Magazine, Christopher Nolan discussed his final Batman film.  Nolan revealed that the films’ events will be taking place 8 years after the events of the previous film, during a time when Bruce Wayne is “not in a great state”.  He also talked about choosing Bane as the primary villain, saying that the goal was to test Batman both physically AND mentally.  Since Bruce went and got everyone excited by going to ninja school in Batman Begins, some critics were largely disappointed with the lack of martial arts in The Dark Knight, which evidently will not be a problem in this film:

“He [Bane] is brutal. Brutal. He’s a big dude who’s incredibly clinical, in the fact that he has a result-based and oriented fighting style. It’s not about fighting. It’s about carnage. The style is heavy-handed, heavy-footed, it’s nasty. Anything from small-joint manipulation to crushing skulls, crushing rib cages, stamping on shins and knees and necks and collarbones and snapping heads off and tearing his fists through chests, ripping out spinal columns. He is a terrorist in mentality as well as brutal action.” — Christopher Nolan

Well that sounds pretty dope Mr. Nolan.  Thankyou for that.  I think we’re all glad to see that this Batman franchise is finally headed in the right direction.  The direction of ripping out peoples’ spinal cords.  Regardless of whether that ends up in the movie or not lets take a look at Batman and his new nemesis Bane.

Bruce Thomas Wayne had the unfortunate luck of witnessing his parents murder when he was a child, an event that birthed his life goal of ridding Gotham City of evil.  Bruce has since evolved into an arrogant billionaire industrialist and notorious playboy by day, and a ruthless masked vigilante by night.  Characterized by his physical prowess and technical ingenuityBatman ‘strikes terror into the hearts of criminals everywhere’.  Indeed Bruce Wayne is a martial arts ‘prodigy’ and excels specifically in japanese jujitsuninjitsuKeysi, and Aikido.  Bold, daring, and audacious with a strict adherence to utility The Caped Crusader is undoubtedly a Promoter Artisan.  Indeed Batman has a thick skin and is a hard-nosed utilitarian, doing whatever it takes to get the job done.  The Dark Knight however knows all too well as most Promoters do, that “he who travels fast, travels alone”.  Until Bane shows up.

Bane spent his childhood and early adult-life in prison, serving a sentence for his fathers crimes.  Bane’s ‘natural abilities’ allowed him to develop ‘extraordinary skills’ within the prison walls including a plethora of brutal martial arts.  Bane has since evolved into a ‘super intelligent world-class fighter’ and a ‘tactical genius’.  Bane is most known for causing a prison break to overwhelm Batman, and then breaking his back while he is weak and tired.  Impulsivefearless, and ridden with brute strengthBane is undoubtedly a Crafter Artisan.  Certainly, Bane like all Crafters communicates primarily through his actions.  Bringing his prison mentality to Gotham City, Bane decided to go after the man that everyone fearedBatman.  Indeed a physical specimen, actor Tom Hardy packed on 30 pounds of muscle to play the role.  Like his fellow Crafters, Bane is ‘fascinated by weapons of all kinds’ and wields them with ‘lethal virtuosity’, taking ‘pride’ in his ‘prowess’.  In other words if I saw this dude on the street, I probably wouldn’t talk sh*t.

Warner Bros. recently announced that fresh new trailers for both The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey and The Dark Knight Rises will be attached to their big holiday release Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows opening December 16th.

Quote1.png Everything’s impossible until somebody does it. Quote2.png

Bruce Wayne (New Earth)

A Second Chance

He is grateful for a second chance. And he is doing well with it – at least for now.

Yes, he screwed up before – royally. He knew it. “I had burned bridges”

No, it wasn’t the addiction. No, that wasn’t it.

“It was the anger.”

“I had issues with anger. I wasn’t behaving professionally. I wasn’t accountable, no consequences, no rules.”

Continue reading A Second Chance

Tactical Lust

Young whippersnapper Ashton Kutcher and used-to-be-fox Demi Moore have evidently called it quits, serving as horribly discouraging news to cougars all over the world.  The couple officially announced their divorce on Thursday, but had been allegedly having marital issues for quite some time now.  Despite such heartbreaking news, both camps are said to be “moving full force ahead in terms of work”, which is probably the issue in the first place.  Or maybe it was the fact that she’s almost 50 (49), and he’s like 15 (33).  Or maybe it’s because he cheated on her.  Regardless of what it was, I think the overall message we need to take from this unfortunate situation is that no one should ever marry the guy from Dude, where’s my car?  But then again, maybe they should.  Demi will reportedly be ‘cleaning up’ from the divorce, as their marriage occurred during the peak of Ashton’s career.  Since Demi made most of her money like 5o years ago when she was young, she gets to keep all of that.  Any money made DURING the marriage however is fair game.  Therefore the overall message to ultimately extract from this situation is that cradle-robbing is a good thing and you can even make a lot of money doing it.  Rude, ignorant, and disrespectful comments aside let’s take a look at this former Hollywood power couple.

Ashton Kutcher is indeed at the peak of his career, hauling in about 12 million this year alone from movies, TV residuals, his production company, and his fat new sitcom paycheck.  Ashton has actually become the highest paid sitcom actor at $700,000 per episode after replacing Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men.  Ashton is most known for his breakout role as Michael Kelso in That 70’s Show, and his popular TV show Punk’d in which he pranked other celebrities.  Ashton is also known for his vibrant and loud personality, which he expresses mainly through his highly utilized and highly popular twitter account.  Indeed Ashton’s twitter account was the first to reach one million followers (beating out CNN) and currently boasts more than 8 million.  Highly entertaining, emotionally expressive and extremely playful and fun-lovingAshton Kutcher is undoubtedly a Performer Artisan.  Indeed Ashton lives with a “radiant warmth and festivity” and clearly has “contagious good humor” and an “irrepressible joy of living”.  It’s not all fun and games however, as “the Performers’ talent for enjoying life is healthy for the most part, though it also makes them more subject to temptations than other types.  ESFPs are inclined to be impulsive and self-indulgent, which makes them vulnerable to seduction, giving in easily to the wishes of others, or to the desire of the moment.”  As evidenced of course by Ashton’s infidelity.  Poor Demi!

Demi Guynes Moore was part of the Brat Pack of teenage actors rising to fame in the 1980’s.  In the 1990’s she became the highest paid actress in Hollywood earning a salary of over 10$ million.  Demi is known mostly for defying convention with her highly controversial nude Vanity Fair cover page, and her sexually-charged roles like those in Striptease and Disclosure.  Bold, daring, audacious, and highly enterprising Demi Moore is undoubtedly a Promoter Artisan.  Certainly Demi is “socially sophisticated” and “suave and polished”.  Promoters like Demi are “master manipulators” of the people around them, as: “people are instruments in the hands of Promoters, and they play them artistically.”  As evidenced of course by Demi marrying a young teenage heart-throb half her age in the peak of his career.  Indeed it seems that Demi got the better end of this deal by a long shot, as through Ashton she was able to continue living in the spotlight, have him help raise her kids, and then ends up leaving with a bunch of his money.  Two And A Half Men airs Mondays 9/8c on CBS.

“Two SPs live primarily in the same world, the world of external, physical reality, speaking the same language of concrete objects, and they also share each other’s childlike love of fun and excitement.  Two SPs have so many interests and activities in common—travel, sports, parties, shows, clothes, and so on—that they can come together as playmates in a way not possible with persons of other temperament.  The only problem is that, with both partners living and playing so hard—going so fast in the same direction—they can quickly exhaust each other and lose interest.  This pattern of two Artisans lighting up the sky brightly and then burning out and falling apart is a familiar one.”  Please Understand Me II, p. 219

Quote1.png I say whatever I think and whatever is on my mind, and I just hope that it comes out good.  I just try to have a lot of fun.Quote2.png

Ashton Kutcher

Eternal Romance

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 opens today much to the joy of pre-pubescent girls all over the country.  Breaking Dawn is the last of four vampire-themed fantasy romance novels, meaning that The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (to be released this time next year) will be the last time that we have to deal with this garbage. While some skeptics might call this stuff low-budget low-talent pop-teen fluffy bullsh*t, it has managed to gain quite a following so let’s not dampen the mood.  The Twilight Saga is a series of stories told primarily through the narrative of a young girl Bella and her romantic encounters with a vampire (left), and a werewolf (right).  The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 begins with a wedding between Bella and Edward (the vampire), so I guess we’ll see how that goes.  Twilight author Stephenie Meyer actually loosely based Breaking Dawn off of Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream, so it can’t be THAT bad.  Criticism aside if you are a hopeless romantic, The Twilight Saga has a lot to grasp on to so let’s go right on ahead and take a look at this delightful and charming story of true love.

Surely one of the most important and appealing concepts of The Twilight Saga is the idea that true love transcends time, as Edward is over 100 years old and yet falls deeply in love with the young human Bella.  Edward however is a pragmatist, and constantly warns Bella against being involved with him despite developing very strong feelings for her.  In the second book Edward even convinces Bella that he doesn’t love her in an attempt to protect her, as he knows that their relationship puts her in danger.  Highly skeptical of the dark world he lives in, extremely resolute in his concern for Bella, and very pragmatic about their forbidden relationship Edward Cullen is undoubtedly a Rational.  Indeed the couples’ entire relationship exists only with monumental amounts of self-control on behalf of Edward, something that Rationals pride themselves on. Bella’s scent is irresistible to Edward, and every second that he is with her his vampiric instincts are telling him to ‘bite’ her, but he ultimately cannot corrupt something that is so pure in his mind.

Despite Bella frequently asking Edward to turn her into a vampire so that they can be together forever, Edward believes that being a vampire is a curse and that they are soulless creatures with no place in heaven.  Indeed Bella possesses an unrelenting energy and passion for their relationship, and fell into a deep depression during their fallout in the second novel.  During such a dark period Bella discovered that she possesses intuitive powers, and can hear Edwards thoughts when she is in danger.  Highly sensitive, extremely empathic, deeply loving, and undeniably intimate Bella Swan is undoubtedly an Idealist.  Indeed Bella uses such danger-invoked telepathic abilities to justify nearly killing herself, a romantic cry for help that screams Idealist.  Certainly, Idealists (like Bella) “have a flair for dramatizing their courtships, and they spare no effort or flight of imagination to win the heart of their loved one.”

Undoubtedly, Bella Swan and Edward Cullen make a charming example of the profound connection between the Idealist Soulmate and the Rational Mindmate:

“The basis of the Idealists and Rationals compatibility is that they both live primarily in the world of abstract concepts–the world of theories and possibilities, of insights and symbols.  After dating more down-to-earth, literal minded Artisans and Guardians, an Idealist’s first encounter with a Rational can be a revelation, putting the NF in touch with a new and intriguing type of person, someone eager and able (like the NF) to dream the world, to build castles in the air, and to see far distances with the mind’s eye.  Also fascinating is the Rational’s calmness and autonomy, two characteristics which give the NT a strength of character—a firm grasp of who they are—that the easily ruffled, soul-searching NF greatly admires, and would like to emulate.” Please Understand Me II, p. 238

Of course once he ‘turns her’ and all the honeymoon and suspense is over, he’ll presumably get fat and lazy and the two will have to suffer through the woes of an actual relationship just like the rest of us.  The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 can be seen starting today at a theater near you.

Quote1.png Before you, Bella, my life was like a moonless night.  Very dark, but there were stars points of light and reason…And then you shot across my sky like a meteor.  Suddently everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty.  When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black.  Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light.  I couldn’t see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything.’Quote2.png

Edward Cullen

Reverence for Life

As a Viking traveler of books and people, I have occasioned to meet a person from a different place, a different time, and a different world, through the labyrinth of books.

Dr. Livingstone, I Presume

Presumably, this is what Henry Stanley said to Dr. David Livingstone, a missionary who had gone into the “wilds of Africa,” and Stanley was paid to find him which took about six months, a difficult and tortuous expedition.

Continue reading Reverence for Life

Timid Diplomacy

The official trailer for Snow White & the Hunstman was released last week and looks pretty damn intriguing.  The film’s lead roles are pretty solidly cast with Charlize Theron as the evil Queen, Kristen Stewart (Twilight) as Snow White, and Chris Hemsworth (Thor) as the Hunstman.  The Universal Studios film will be a “darker and more epic” take on the classic Disney tale, and will compete directly with Tarsem Singh‘s more family-friendly and comedy-oriented version titled Mirror, Mirror (who coincidentally released a trailer yesterday) to be released two months prior.  Some skeptics argue that the very premise of the film is fundamentally flawed, being a movie essentially about how Charlize Theron is jealous because Kristen Stewart is hotter than she is.  Which doesn’t make any sense.  Superficial and chauvinistic comments aside let’s take a look at Walt Disney’s first animated feature, the absolutely adorable and heart-warming classic tale of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.

Snow White is a princess who lives with her stepmother, a vain and wicked queen who consults her Magic Mirror daily to find out ‘who is the fairest one of all’.  One day the mirror tells the queen that Snow White has become the fairest of all, to which the queen responds with utmost distaste and orders a huntsman to kill Snow White and take her heart.  The huntsman ultimately fails to fulfill such a horrid task, so Snow White runs into the forest where she encounters seven charming and adorable dwarves.  Upon meeting the dwarves for the first time, Snow White uses her intuition to guess the names of all seven (Doc, Grumpy, Happy, Sleepy, Bashful, Sneezy, and Dopey) and they immediately warm up to her kind-hearted semblance.  Each of the seven dwarves of course has a unique personality quirk as evidenced by their names, to which Snow White provides encouraging warmth and comfort.  Harmoniously diplomatic, a hopeless romantic, adorably timid, and highly nurturing with an affinity for cute forest creatures Snow White is undoubtedly a Counselor Idealist.  Indeed Snow White comes into possession of a small army of forest creatures including a variety of squirrels, birds and deer who follow her around and even help her clean and maintain the dwarves house.  She even manages to warm the heart of Grumpy, who by definition is, well, Grumpy.  The evil Queen of course tries to ruin the fun with a poison apple, but ultimately fails and dies.  Naturally, a charming prince happens to be on call to save the day and everyone lives happily ever after.  Let’s assume this modern take on the classic story will have slight differences in plot.  Snow White and the Hunstmen is slated for a June 1, 2012 release.

Quote1.png Some day when spring is here / We’ll find our love anew / And the birds will sing / And wedding bells will ring / Some day when my dreams come true. Quote2.png

Snow White

One in the Same

At last, every hero becomes a bore.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

He saw himself and the institution he built as one in the same.

He was revered and reviled. He was founder and the builder of an United States Federal institution, that now has over thirty thousand employees and has a budget of eight billion. Once upon a time, famous, and respected, he was idolized by kids in the 1930s, for he was responsible for creating the good feelings about G men (government men), the prototypical hero of law and order, and justice, in an earlier age when government wasn’t as pervasive as it is today. Later, he was hated and reviled, on the top of list of the 1960s conspiracy theorist’s boogie men: he was viewed as a nexus for secrets, power, and repression of free speech.

Continue reading One in the Same

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