Netflix, Warner Bros., Gilmore Girls

Idiosyncractic Coven

WB/Netflix comedy-drama Gilmore Girls premiered its 8th season / revival mini-series last week after a short hiatus.

Rottentomatoes: 88%

Metacritic: 81

IMDb: 8.4

Emmys: 1 win

***Spoilers Ahead***

Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Warner Bros. Television, Netflix

Lorelai Gilmore

Lorelai Gilmore’s daughter Rory returns home to troll her and actually decides to write a book basically about how weird her mother is.  Subsequently, Lorelai is bamboozled into therapy with her own mother Emily Gilmore after her father passes.

Lorelai and her boyfriend Luke Danes, a humble restaurant owner, have been dating for over ten years but have yet to marry.  She owns and operates a small luxury Dragonfly Inn for peripheral celebrities.

Lorelai and Luke finally marry one another, while Rory has been impregnated by her paramour, whom is engaged to a french heiress.

Lorelai Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Warner Bros. Television, Netflix

“Please, Luke.  Please, please, please.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“None.  Five, but yours is better.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“At least you have your new slogan.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“I’m not that happy.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Copper boom!” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Luke can waltz.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1It’d be like the first 15 minutes of Saving Private Ryan, but at least those guys got to be in France.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“I stopped being a child the minute the strip turned pink.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Oy with the poodles already.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“I smell snow.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1That’s how you look when you get off a plane?  You’ve been stuffed in a glorified tin can for seven hours surrounded by people with consumption, diphtheria, scabies, hummus dip, rabid dogs, drugged up children attacking your chair, stealing your change.  You should look drawn and blotchy.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“You should be signing ‘I dreamed a dream’ with a bad haircut while selling yourself to a bunch of French dockworkers.  Instead, you look perfect.  Admit it.  You’ve been gooped.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“You’re doing yoga in the aisles in cashmere sweatpants while your comfort dog watches Zoolander 2 on his watch.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Haven’t done that for a while.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1I’ve missed you, kid.  How long’s it been?  Coffee and tacos.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“All right, shall we get it out of the way?  One day?  That’s all?  You miss Christmas and Thanksgiving and all I get is a one day visit?  What am I?  Chopped liver?” — Lorelai Gilmore

“London, again.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“And the cat’s in the cradle And the silver spoon.  Oh, wow!  Nicely played.  All right, you win.  We have limited time.  Should we skip the town tour?  Well, we’ll keep it short.  Le Chat Club closed due to rats.  We got parking meters.  No one would pay so they took them out.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Al’s Pancake World won best Christmas decorations again.  There’s a debate going on about taking the phone booth out.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“I made the same excellent point.  Ooh, I saved the best for last.  Taylor has decided that septic systems are beneath us and he wants to go full-on sewer.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“He’s going door to door collecting people’s septic tank horror stories.  Then, he’ll compile them, then he and a panel will stage testimonial re-enactments for the county assessor.  Is it working?” — Lorelai Gilmore

“She just got off a plane!” — Lorelai Gilmore

“You’ve got more burners than Omar Little.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“The fact that the entire town was actually constructed in a giant snow glove probably has an effect on your bar count.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Same one every year.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Oh, yes.  Come on.  Let’s get in out of the snow!  Luke’s gonna be so excited to see you.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Luke!  It’s a Christmas miracle!” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Super-proud!” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1Only the world.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“Wow.  So I’m fat?  Body shaming.  Trigger warnings!  War on Christmas!” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1I thought cooking was supposed to be relaxing.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“I’m gonna miss it.  It had that early American tenement shtetl slash Trainspotting vibe that every mother wants for her little girl.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Damn that TSA!  I did.  And I must say, I found it very disappointing.  Ya, I thought there’d be something fun in there, you know, like a treasure map or the prequel to Huckleberry Finn where Huck is a **** leader and terrified of water.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“I’m Gwen freakin’ Stefani.  Want to borrow some underwear?” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1Any outfit you wear without underwear will be your ‘lucky’ outfit.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1Is your hair different?  Lose some weight?  Gain some weight?  I’ve never seen that boy before in my life.  They’ve been together for months.  He’s been to the house!  He’s like a superhero, but his power is that you can’t remember him no matter how much time you spend with him.  Kind of live every Marvel movie ever.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“Lifetime Movie Channel classics.  A rebellious girl hooks up with an escort agency where her stepfather is a client.  Alec Baldwin.  Pre-yoga.  Keep.  Keep.  Keep.  Keep!  Where’s my pajamas?  Ugh… Felix… I like my pajamas on the chair, all crinkled up and ready for bed, not suffocating in a drawer.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1You should find my bedtime rituals endearing by now.  What’s taking you so long?Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“Oh, really?  ‘Cause you’ve been so stingy with your praise.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Eh, she’s alright.  She’s freaked out she’s gonna hear our rollicking lovemaking.  Organizing my magazines by Kardashian.  I’m not stalling.  I’m organizing.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1Let’s just sleep standing up, like cows.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“You won’t make me turn it off when the suspicious sister, co-worker, or gay friend investigates the abandoned cabin by the lake where they find all the proof they need to expose the killer and then they get hit in the head with a hammer?  Rory will think we’re rollicking.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Yeah, everything’s fine.  I annoy him and he builds cabinets.  Or that’s what I think.  He says we need the storage.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“To absent friends.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1People are dumb.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“You knew when Luke moved in with me he’d turn weird eventually.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“You have got to cut that poor boy loose.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Why does it smell like onions in here?” — Lorelai Gilmore

“No.  Yes.  All good.  You’re right.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1I was under a lot of pressure.  You weren’t there.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“I wish she was a groupie.  I’d get better tickets to stuff.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1Oh, that I could.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1Wow, the student surpasses the master.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“Just a person.  A normal person with an office and a prescription pad.  That could work, too.  Till you get back on your feet.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“What’s the big deal?  No. You’re in pan.  This is uncharted territory.  If it might help, what’s the harm?  Okay.  But really consider it.  And if you do it, commit.  You know, really go for it.  Jump in with both feet.  Five, six days a week.  Really Woody Allen the hell out of it.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1Oh, crap.  I’m going to therapy with my mother.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1I would like to say that… I was wrong.  And… I’m very, very sorry.  What do you got?  It was a blanket apology.  I think that’s very generous.  Plus, it’s retroactive.  So, enjoy.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“Like it was a Penn and Teller show before this?  You were the one complaining that I wasn’t saying anything.  Claudia, let the record, show, I broke the silence here today, okay?  She wasn’t saying anything either.  Write that down in your scorebook.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“How much time do we have left?” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Well, she used that maneuver, write that down.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1I have specific tastes.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“It was a joke.  It was a joke.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“How about scotch, mom.  Feels like a scotch night.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1My Wonder Woman stamina and a box of twinkies.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

Quote1It’s from the Godfather.  It has a quote for every circumstance.Quote2 — Lorelai Gilmore

“I understand.  I always understand.  For the last 32 years, I have been the queen of understanding.  I can’t.  Not this time.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“Everything in life has something to do with coffee.  I believe in a former life, I was coffee.” — Lorelai Gilmore

“I admit.  It sounded weird.” — Lorelai Gilmore

Witty, neurotic, nitpicking, and clumsy Lorelai Gilmore is a Rational.

Rory Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Warner Bros. Television, Netflix

Rory Gilmore

Rory Gilmore decides to take a wayfarer’s journey home in her lower 30’s the prodigal daughter having written articles for the New York Times.  She decides to pursue freelance writing opportunities while bouncing back-and-forth from London and Stars Hallow, where her boyfriend Logan Huntzberger, and quirky mother Lorelai reside respectively.

Her ghost writing project with an eccentric alcoholic client falls through so she tries running a story for GQ, which also doesn’t pan out.

She meets with her step-brother Jess Mariano, who encourages her to write her own book about her unique life with her mother Lorelai.

Rory Gilmore, Gilmore Girls, Warner Bros. Television, Netflix

“I got a kissed.  And I shoplifted.” — Rory Gilmore

“Did you do something slutty?” — Rory Gilmore

“Luke can waltz?” — Rory Gilmore

“You jump, I jump, Jack.” — Rory Gilmore

Quote1Because I love you, you idiot.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

“That’s how you say hello?  What airline are you flying?” — Rory Gilmore

“I have not been gooped.” — Rory Gilmore

“I do blood clot prevention foot pumps wearing my Yonah Schimmel Knishery baseball cap while toothpaste dries up a zit on my chin.  Wow!  Winded.  Felt good.” — Rory Gilmore

Quote1Missed you, too.  Feels like years.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

“Princess Charlotte iced tea spoons.  Minus well.  I’m sorry!” — Rory Gilmore

“I have to be on the red-eye to London tomorrow night.  For work. Oh, now, Emily.” — Rory Gilmore

“We can’t skip the town tour.  Again?  Where?  This town is mob ruled.” — Rory Gilmore

“It’s that nativity scene with eggplant Jesus.  You just can’t beat it.” — Rory Gilmore

“Where would Superman change when he comes to save our town from Ben Affleck.  What’s with the signs?” — Rory Gilmore

“How can we do that?  Oh, Lord!  Are you telling me this to get me to stay longer?  Kind of.” — Rory Gilmore

Quote1I got a personal phone, a work phone, and the only phone that gets reception in Stars Hollow.  Theoretically.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

“Hold on, I’m not really home till I get my Stars Hallow Gazette.  Manger news, Santa’s wishes, eggnog checkpoints, and… the Christmas poem.  Every single year.  Good to be home.” — Rory Gilmore

“It was just one Talk of the Town piece.” — Rory Gilmore

“It was a perfectly decent apartment.” — Rory Gilmore

“It just seemed like the right time to say…  bye-bye Brooklyn.  This box is open.  Really?  You went through my stuff?  You found my personal items disappointing?” — Rory Gilmore

“I think it’s kind of exciting, you know?  No apartment, no rent, no ties.  I could crash here, I could crash at Lane’s.  I feel like this is my time to be rootless and just see where life takes me, and travel wherever there’s a story to write.  I just wish I had remembered to label my boxes because now I know where nothing is.  My boots, my coats, my underwear… Could be at Lane’s?” — Rory Gilmore

Quote1Don’t judge.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

“I’d like to stop talking about underwear.  I’m looking for my lucky outfit.” — Rory Gilmore

Quote1I have a big meeting with Condé Nast and I have this look that makes me feel like Diane Sawyer.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

“I invited him for dinner, and I totally forgot.  Crap, crap, crap!” — Rory Gilmore

“I mean it!  This is my stress relief.  Do not make my stress relief stressful.” — Rory Gilmore

“It’s okay.  I have a lot of irons in the fire.  I’m still getting a lot of good responses from the New Yorker piece so..” — Rory Gilmore

“Do you think it’s because of grandpa?  I miss him.” — Rory Gilmore

“To absent friends.  You know, some people might say drinking coffee in the middle of the night could hinder your sleep.” — Rory Gilmore

“I am not homeless.  Just for now.” — Rory Gilmore

“Hellions in arms.” — Rory Gilmore

“It’s not really what I do, but it’s good for now.  And it’s money.  Money is nice.  So, now I just have to hang out with her more to get a handle on the first few chapters so we can bit it out and see who wants it.  All that starts in a month, when she gets back from India.  Basically, I had a good day.  How was your day?” — Rory Gilmore

Quote1Well, I like weird.  I was formed by weird.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

Quote1Weird makes good copy.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

“Look, we have an agreement.  What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.  And when we leave Vegas, we forget about Vegas, until we’re back in Vegas and then it’s just us in Vegas until… Throw me a rope, man.” — Rory Gilmore

Quote1But I’m a writer.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

Quote1Are you the whale or the rabbit?Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

“Here’s one.  Uh, why don’t we just focus on your story for now, and we’ll talk about the whale and the rabbit later?” — Rory Gilmore

“She had five martinis.  Five.  And she got there before I did.  I don’t even know what she had before that.” — Rory Gilmore

Quote1She’s a character.  But that’s what makes her unique.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

“Fine.  It wasn’t exactly the next Cloud Atlas.” — Rory Gilmore

“Last time I checked, grain was a food group.” — Rory Gilmore

“I could’ve been a contender.  Oh yeah?  I’m broke.  Busted.  Beggared.  I have no apartment.  No car.  My license expired three months ago.  Everything I own is in boxes scattered around three different states.  I have no job.  I have no credit.  I have no underwear.  I can’t find that box.  Are you listening man?  I’m broke.” — Rory Gilmore

“What is this foreign concept you speak of?  ‘Passion?’  Is that really a thing?” — Rory Gilmore

“No, that’s not how you and I work.  We don’t do passive-aggressive. That’s how you and your mother work.  You should be on my side.  I need this.  Can’t you understand that?” — Rory Gilmore

Quote1No.  No, I don’t need lipitor.  I need to be 20 again.Quote2 — Rory Gilmore

“In all the gin joints in all the world.” — Rory Gilmore

Free-spirited, ephemeral, poised, an avid wordsmith, Rory Gilmore is an Idealist.

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