Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment

Rocket Science

Netflix original comedy Space Force dropped May 29, 2020.

#SpaceForcehas reportedly been renewed for a second season.

rottentomatoes: 39%

metacritic: 49

imdb: 6.8

General Naird, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment

General Naird

General Mark Naird is tasked with leading the military branch of space exploration outside of Wild Horse, Colorado.

General Naird, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment“Thank you.  Thank you.  It has always been my dream to command a service branch.  I have been shot down, both literally and figuratively, but I have always gotten back up.  All right.  My old CO used to say the greatest asset in an F-35, and that is a $100 million plane, is its pilot.  When I was– all right.  I’ll skip ahead.  There’s much more that I could say.  I only wish that… my parents could have been here to see this.  But they were unable to get flights from New Jersey in time.  Maggie, Erin, this is a Naird family team win.  Thanks.  It’s a different administration, bug.  This one’s… a little more chaotic.  Kick.  Like me.  They didn’t tell you?  Or did you forget?  Like you forgot to get competitive bidding for the AT-6B.  Gender roles.  Offensive.  And out of date.  Just like you.  But I don’t have to listen to it anymore.  Good luck with your retirement, Kick.  And I say that facetiously, because you’re a crook and a womanizer, and I hate your guts.  God, that felt good.” — General Naird

“Excuse me.  Why is Kick still in the room?  I don’t– hmm.  Hmm?  What?  Oh, you’re still last.  I can be flexible if I’m ordered to be.  I’ll admit I was a little disappointed at first.  But then I saw this painting.  John Paul Jones.  And it made me think.  The founder of the Space Force, that’s going to be me.  This is such a great opportunity to start something from the ground up.  We’re gonna build a huge new base.  Oh, well, it’s definitely gonna be on the other side of Dulles.  By about 2,000 miles.  We’re going to Colorado.  There’s this old NORAD facility that’s got a lot of potential.  And Colorado?  Oh!  Up and coming.  Did you know Amazon put their new headquarters there?  No.  But they seriously considered it.  You and Erin are gonna love it there.  Gonna learn how to ride horses.  It’s gonna be a good year.  And next year at this time… we might have boots on the moon.” — General Naird

“Launch?  What base?  Hey.  There’s a guy in the trunk.  Hold him till after the launch.  Yes.  Dr. Mallory.  Yes, he is.  Thank you, Brad.  No. Senator Schugler, Pitosi, and the angry young congresswoman are coming.  They need to see a success so we can keep our funding.  That is not going to happen.  Ah… you are a civilian advisor.  There are always going to be risks.  Conditions are never perfect.  The delegation will be back in Washington tomorrow.  I hired you.  We.  Who is this ‘we’ that you keep talking about?  Nothing is above my pay grade at this base.  Nope.” — General Naird

“No, launch is still on.  What?  No!  Nobody gets to scrub anything but me.  Hello, Yuri.  I know.  Thank you, Brad.  What are you doing in here?  That is not accurate, Yuri.  Why would you need to see that?  Hmm.  Well, that is weird.  I’m sure if the president would like me to show you something, he will let me know.  How do you know about the secure phone.  You just said ‘secure phone.’  Yes, you did.  You said ‘secure phone.’  You just said it.  Yes, you did.” — General Naird

“We may have to scrub the Epsilon launch.  Is Yellowjacket ready to show off?  Oh, for Christ’s sake.  They’re a billion dollars and six months over.  Damn right.  Let’s move.  No.  Keep up.  Will Yellowjacket be impressive enough?  Oh.  Hey.  Looks good.  Sweet.  Very sleek.  Like the yellow fins.  Do we have enough of these to do a test launch later as well?  Okay, let’s do this.  Well, that’s not ready yet.  How much was that prototype.  Million?  Fuck!  Keep up.  No.  Good morning.  I… I don’t get it.  Yes.  So What I am saying is that if I had a lightsaber, I would be able to cook… this hamburger better.  How is this relevant to the mission?  I don’t see how being snarky about a fast-food hamburger is culturally anything.  Do you even understand what is at stake here?  I’m trying to put boots on the moon.  Boots on the moon.  A laser sword is a child’s toy.  Okay.  I think we’re done.  Okay.  Sassy.  How about this for sass?  You’re fired.  Your services will no longer be needed here at Space Force.  Brad.  Would you make sure that Tony is detained until after the launch so he doesn’t tweet anything snotty?  Thank you.” — General Naird

“A little low, don’t you think?  At your discretion.  Yes, I believe I’ve flown every F series from the Tomcat to the F-117 Nighthawk.  What’s your name?  ROTC?  Air Force or Space Force?  You don’t like to use your full title?  Nothing to be ashamed of.  Air Force has airmen.  Space Force has spacemen.  Nothing embarrassing or comical about it.” — General Naird

“The Earth is the only planet in our universe that we know of that sustains life.  Fifty years ago, Americans landed on the lunar surface and took that photo.  Hashtag ‘awesome,’ huh?  Well, guess what, kids?  We’re going back.  Not for science this time.  Not to collect a bunch of rocks.  But to occupy.  Boots on the moon!  Boots on the moon.  And even though this will be an international mission, harnessing the best and brightest minds from around the globe, rest assured these will be US boots.  Boots with US feet in ’em, I mean.  Can’t be certain where the boots will actually be made.  Maybe Mexico.  Maybe Portugal.  We’re getting bids on the boots.  One thing’s for certain, though.  Those boots are gonna have our feet in ’em.  Seniors, if you enlist for a four-year stint as a space cadet, you can earn up to $35,000 for college.  I don’t know what else to call it but a pretty sweet deal.  So what’s it gonna be?  You gonna sit there like an idiot doing nothing?  Or are you gonna join Space Force and shoot for the stars?  Thank you.  Thank you.  Thank you.  Thanks for coming.  See you on the moon, gentlemen.” — General Naird

“Hey, bug.  Absolutely not.  Hello.  Uh, no.  Goodbye.  I know him?  Bobby who?  Yuri?  That’s the Bobby that you’ve been seeing?  He’s ten years older than you.  Jesus Christ, Erin.  Hello.  Have a good day.  No, he’s not.  He is a bad, bad man.  I never called this town a shithole.  It’s a very fine town.  Very fine.  Don’t play that game with me, Erin.  It’s not going to work.  I’ll talk it over with mommy.  Hello.” — General Naird

“How you doing?  You eating all right?  Nice.  Well, you look– you look great.  Mmm.  I miss you.  Very much.  No.  No.  No!  No.  I am your husband.  Absolutely not.  I don’t want you to bring this up again.  Please.  Erin wants to go to a concert in the desert this weekend with this older Russian guy, who I think is just using her to get information.  Do you think I should let her go?  Hmm.  Louise sounds like a good friend.” — General Naird

“Oh, shoot.  Gonna be late.  Set me down next to the BX, please.  I am telling you to do it, so you can do it.  I have a congressional delegation down there waiting for me.  Thin ice, Captain.  Thin ice.  I’m late for a meeting.  Get it done.  I have complete confidence in you, ma’am.  My apologies.  Had a little chopper trouble.  I would recommend the tuna.  A sandwich.  And a good one.  Ladies and gentlemen, I assure you we are on track, and Epsilon will launch at 1700 hours.  That is correct.  I believe those are from Star Wars.  But if I had a laser cannon, I would probably use it to cook a Wendy’s hamburger.  The Epsilon is equipped with a kinetic disabling system.  It can eject a metal net, and it is our hope that we can get this net to tangle with enemy satellites.  Tangling them.  Oh, sorry.  Excuse me.  Oh, God.  I have to take this.  Dad, is everything all right?  Okay, dad, is the caretaker there?  Please put the caretaker on.  Well, as you know, my wife is in prison.  No, dad.  Dad, don’t do– we have people to crawl under the house, dad.  Oh, my God.  Oh, my God.  Please, dad, don’t, don’t– don’t crawl under the house!  Is the caretaker there, dad?  Put the caretaker on.  I wish I could, Jean Baptiste, but I’m having kind of a day of it myself.  And please, don’t let my dad go under the house again.  No, no, no, no!  You have to keep eyes on him.  Do you undertand?” — General Naird

Dr. Adrian Mallory, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, John MalkovichDr. Adrian Mallory

“We need to cancel the launch.  Oh.  My idea of success would not be a six-billion-dollar piece of hardware breaking up over Denver.  Look, I don’t like to pull rank, but I order you to postpone the launch.  Okay?  There’s too much moisture in the air.  We prefer a less ionized environment.  They’re supposed to be perfect tomorrow.  You know, Mark, when I hired you… …I felt your best quality was your ability to listen to good advice.  If you’ve lost that, we may have to look elsewhere.  That is above your pay grade.  Just postpone the launch, dear.” — Dr. Adrian Mallory

Maggie Naird, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Lisa Kudrow

Maggie Naird

“So proud of you.  The Air Force chief’s house in Arlington is gorgeous and comes with a staff.  Thank you.” — Maggie Naird

“So, how are you handling this?  I know you wanted the Air Force, and you’re not the most flexible person.  Mmm.  Well, DC real estate, the way it is, you’ll be lucky if it’s this side of Dulles Airport.  What?  Really?” — Maggie Naird

“Okay.  Yeah.    Oh, yeah.  Yeah.  They’re letting me grow radishes in a window box, and I can pretty much eat them whenever I want.  Yeah.  And there’s this guard, Louise, she slips me some food sometimes.  Ugh.  Mark, I’m gonna be in here a long time.  So if you need… companionship– yes, but I’ll understand if you– how’s Erin?  Eighteen is that age where you make mistakes and figure some things out.  Well, I just don’t know how you can stop her.  Louise says if you can’t do anything about a situation, you might as well lean back and let it happen.  Well…” — Maggie Naird

Erin Naird, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Diana SilversErin Naird

“Woo-woo.  I don’t get it.  Dad, when you made three-star, we had 100 guests and a band.  Dad, I am so proud of you.” — Erin Naird

“Hey.  I need $100.  Bobby’s taking me to the desert for a pop-up concert.  Dad, it’s fine.  Just, like, give me the money.  Okay, but you know Bobby.  You work with him.  Bobby Telatovich.  He’s very sweet.  Well, it wasn’t my idea to move to this shithole.  Well, I’m going with or without you, and I guess if I have no money, I’ll just be totally reliant on Bobby.  Have to do whatever Bobby says.  Thank you, General.” — Erin Naird

Brad Gregory, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Don LakeBrad Gregory

“Big launch today, sir.  The congressional delegation will be arriving for lunch.  You have to speak for ten minutes at the local high school.  Don’t worry.  We have a new helo pilot.  We’ll get you in and out of there in no time.  And the launch at 1700 is set to be a live feed on the East Coast.  You have a light day today, so you can start in the gym, and your calendar says it’s a leg day.  Oh!  Dr. Mallory is waiting for you.  He said not to say anything.” — Brad Gregory

“So, the launch today, I hear.  Oh.  I’ll have to tell the base biologist.  She has to collect all the endangered lizards within 600 yards of the launch site.  I canceled her because Mallory told me the launch was scrubbed.  Oh.  Got it, sir.  Oh.  Uh, Yuri’s in there.  He told me not to say anything.” — Brad Gregory

“So I hear we’re going with Yellowjacket this afternoon?  Sorry, Sheila.  Still have to grab those lizards.  Oh.  Fuck Tony’s in there.  Yes, sir.  Got it.” — Brad Gregory

F. Tony Scarapiducci, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Ben SchwartzF. Tony Scarapiducci

“Hey.  Good morning, my general.  I have your daily tweet ready for you to review, and I think you’re gonna love it.  You’re gonna eat it up.  Go.  Yum-yum.  Any of it?  Okay.  All right.  You know there’s a new Star Wars out?  And Wendy’s has a new hamburger that they’re serving rare, so… there you go.  It took a while, but you got it.  This is culturally relevant.  It’s a lightsaber.  Did you hear yourself?  Laser sword?  You don’t understand because you’re old.  You get likes dunking on the Twitter accounts of sassy fast-food brands.  I don’t even know why I’m explaining clapback theory to you.  Every time I explain anything, it seems to just go ‘phew.’  What?  You’re firing me for writing a perfect tweet?  Is that why you’re firing me?  Fine, fine, fine.  You know what?  Enjoy your 3,000 engineer followers, because honestly, you are hopeless.” — F. Tony

“What’s going on?  Are you serious?  Stop– Siri, send tweet.  Send tweet!” — F. Tony

Captain Angela Ali, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Tawny NewsomeCaptain Angela Ali

“I’m flying safely, sir.  But I can lift up if you like.  You’re, uh– you’re rated for F-25’s, aren’t you, sir?  That’s dope, sir.  Captain Angela Ali, sir.  OCS.  Uh, I’m actually a prior.  I transferred as a First Class, sir.  Space Force, sir.  Sorry, sir.  Spaceman First Class.  Yes, sir.  Uh… I can’t do that, sir.  I have to land on the designated pad.  Um, it’s only another 100 yards, sir, and I’m sure you’re gonna do great with the delegation, even if you’re a minute late.” — Captain Angela Ali

John Blandsmith, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Dan BakkedahlSec Def John Blandsmith

“Four-star general.  There is no rank higher in the United States military.  You report only to Sec Def and POTUS, the commander chief.  Congratulations, General Naird.  General.  Joint Chiefs in five minutes.  Come on.” — John Blandsmith

“Welcome, gentlemen, thank you for joining us.  POTUS wants to make some changes.  He’s tweeting about it in five minutes, so let’s hope you like it.  I wanna welcome our newest four-star general, Mark Naird, formerly number two at the Air Force.  He’s done an amazing job, has a most distinguished career.  Our nation’s internet in– our nation’s internet, including Twitter, runs through our vulnerable space satellites.  POTUS wants complete space dominance.  Boots on the moon by 2024.  To that end, the president is creating a new branch.  Space Force.  Which Mark will run.  In close cooperation with Air Force, which Kick will still head.  This is not a joke.  His words!  Boots on the moon by 2024.  Actually, he said, ‘boobs on the moon,’ but we believe that to be a typo.  You’re behind Salvation Army, Louis.” — John Blandsmith

General Kick Grabaston, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Noah EmmerichGeneral Kick Grabaston

“Get lost, Naird.  This is four-stars.  Tell me what?  That you wear a dress?  I knew that already.  Oh, you’ve gotta be kidding me.  This is bullshit.  Space is part of the air.  Naird works for me.  There certainly isn’t any damn water, Admiral, so you don’t get an opinion.  Oh, definitely last.”

Chief of Naval Operations, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Jane LynchChief of Naval Operations

“Uh, hang on.  Hang on.  I don’t think there’s air in space.”

General Rongley, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Diedrich BaderGeneral Rongley

“Air Force used to just be part of the Army, Kick.  I’d like to stuff you both back in.”

Commandant of the Marine Corps, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Patrick WarburtonCommandant of the Marine Corps

“If there’s no air or water, two questions.  What is it exactly, and why can’t they hear you scream?”

Commandant of the Coast Guard, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Larry Joe CampbellCommandant of the Coast Guard

“Well, at least Coast Guard isn’t last in line anymore.”

Yuri Telatovich, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Alex SparrowYuri Telatovich

“Do you keep breath mints anywhere?  Uh, I heard the launch was scrubbed.  Call me Bobby.  It’s more reassuring.  Can I see technical specifications for the Epsilon part E-16f fuel pump.  Well, as observer from ISS partner country, I just want to… observe it.  Your president desires close cooperation and good relations between US and Russia.  Come on.  We’re not China here.  Very well.  Expect a text from the secure phone.  I don’t know about the secure phone.  No, I didn’t.  I didn’t say that.  No, I did not.  Oh!  Breath mints.  Here they are.”

Convenient Store Clerk

“Big launch today, huh?  At the new base.  Oh, right.  It’s a secret.  If you told me, you’d have to kill me, right?  What the fuck, man?”

Space Force Campus Soldier 1

“Sir.  Yes, sir.”

Space Force Sergeant

“♪ I don’t know but I been told ♪  Outer space is very cold ♪  Outer space is very cold… ♪”

Bert Mellows, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Roy Wood Jr.Liaison Bert Mellows

“Yo!  Oh.  General Naird.  I doubt it.  You’re right.  We should be able to see something.  I’ll make a call.  Are you running?  First super-pressured ultra-fast satellite-killer killer missile?  Fucking impressive to me.  Yeah.  Mm-hmm.  Yes, sir.  Go time.  Four.  Middle schools.  Cost as much as four new middle schools.  You are running!”

Space Force Employee 1

“Roger that, go time.”

Space Force Security 1

“Secure the phone.”

Space Force Security 2

“Yes, sir.”


“Where are you.  It’s good for you.  Come on out.  Ooh, gotcha.”

Wild Horse High Student

“We’re signing up, General.”

Space Force Attendee 1

“General Naird.”

Kelly King

“Hey, General?  General.  A word.  I ran the numbers, and I can’t put the bowling alley under cyclotron unless the bowling alley is curved, and I don’t see how that works.  Okay, it’s Kelly.  It’s Kelly.”

Congressional Delegation 1

“Oh.  Nice of you to join us.  But with a grain of truth.  Kick Grabaston at Air Force told us confidentially that this base was a complete waste of money.  And the Epsilon is the new spacecraft fighter, right?  What kind of armament will it have on board?  Laser cannon?  Pulse weapon?  Yep.  Meaning?  Six billion for a net?  Not a good look.”

Congressional Delegation 2

“So, uh, what’s good here?  Exploding them?”

Congressional Delegation 3

“Sushi?  How much are taxpayers paying to fly that in?  I knew that.  It was a joke.  This better be one fucking flawless launch.”

Fred Naird, Space Force, Netflix, Deedle-Dee Productions, Film Flam, 3 Arts Entertainment, Fred WillardFred Naird

“Yeah, only your mom has run off again.  I can’t see her.  I’d run after her, but I think I had a small heart attack this morning.  You know, I’m feeling a little draggy.  He’s on his way.  He should be here any minute.  He’s on his way.  He should be here any minute.  So how’s the lady situation?  Uh-huh.  You know what I had to do yesterday?  I had to crawl under the house to check a leak.  I crawled under.  I didn’t tell anybody, and they didn’t know I was under there.  So how’s things?  How’s your– how’s your wife?  Yeah, you two are gonna make a great couple.  Uh, yeah.  What?  He wants to talk to you.  Ask him… ask him how his wife is.”

Caretaker Jean Baptiste

“What are you doing?  Have to get in the house.  Get in the house.  Oh, God.  I don’t know what to do.  Your father should be in the hospital.  Your mama is somewhere in the streets in her nightgown.  Can you come home and help me?  I try.  You know he do whatever he want.  Yes, Mr. Naird.”

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