Paramount+ original film Catch Me If You Can was released December 25th, 2002.
#CMIYC hauled in $352.1M at the international box office.
rottentomatoes: 96%
metacritic: 75
imdb: 8.1
oscars: 2 nominations
golden globes: 1 nomination
SAG awards: 1 win
Frank Abagnale Jr.
Frank Abagnale Jr. kites over $4 million in fraudulent checks starting in New Rochelle, New York.
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture – Drama
1 nomination: 2003
“My name is Frank William Abagnale. His name was Carl Hanratty. Help me. Help me. Help me. Help me. Ok, Carl… let’s go home. You hear that, Daddy? Yeah, we know the story, Daddy. Blonde bombshell. Holding their breath for you. You hear that? ‘I will not leave France without her.’ You didn’t. Dad… why? Is it snowing? I overslept again, huh? All right. What’s next? Dad, wha-what’s all this for? ‘Cause they have Mickey Mantle? Dad, how could you just let him take our car like that?” — Frank Abagnale
“Hey, Dad. I don’t know. She said something about going to look for a job. You want some pancakes? I didn’t think you forgot. I won’t. Thanks, Dad. Didn’t that bank turn you down for a loan, though? Then why are you opening a banking account with them? I’m in their little club. It’s even got my name there, huh? To the moon!” — Frank Abagnale
“Ma, you said you were going to quit. I’m used to it. Excuse me. Do you know where room 17 French is? Quiet down, people! My name is Mr. Abagnale! That’s Abagnale, not Abagnahlee, not Abagnaylee, but Abagnale! Now, somebody please tell me where you left off in your textbooks. Excuse me, people, if I need to ask again, I’m going to write up the entire class. Take your seats! Will you please open your textbooks to, uh, chapter eight, and we’ll get started. Excuse me, what’s your name? Brad, why don’t you get up here in front of the class here and read conversation number five? Well, uh, I always sub for Roberta. Excuse me, why aren’t you reading? You should fold it. That note. It’s a fake, right? You should fold it. Yeah, but there’s no crease in the paper. When your mom hands you a note to miss school, the first thing you do is you fold it and you put it in your pocket. I mean, if it’s real, where’s the crease?” — Frank Abagnale
“Ma, I’m home. Oh, you remember that girl Joanna I was telling you about? I asked her out today. Think we’re going to go to the Junior Prom. Ma, is this my driver’s license? Dad’s at the store. Wait. Is this yours? No. You promised you were going to quit. Ma, I’m home! You.. you stay away from me, hear me? I don’t know who you are but if you ever come back here again… Dad, what’s going on? Dad, what name? Hi. One ticket to Grand Central, please. Is it okay if I write you a check?” — Frank Abagnale
“Carl, when do I get to call my father? You know, Carl, on the other side of the hotel they got suites that face the park. It’s okay, I’ve stayed in worse. Mr. Mudrick, please. You have to listen. But listen, I’m telling you, the bank, they made a mistake. I’ll write you another check right now! Look, it’s midnight, Mr. Mudrick. Where am I gonna go? I mean, I hope you understand. My boss sent me to Brooklyn, then Queens. Now he wants me in Long Island to take a few clients out for a night on the town. What did you say your name was? Ashley, you know what I found on the sidewalk out there? Must’ve slipped right off your neck.” — Frank Abagnale
“Well, you see, it’s my grandmother’s birthday next week and I want to get her something extra-special. Please, I mean, it’s my midterm next week and my books were stolen. Please, it’s just five dollars. No one would know. Dear Dad: I have decided to become an airline pilot. I have applied to all the big airlines and I have several promising interviews lined up. How’s Mom? Have you called her lately? Love, your son, Frank. Hello. I’m Frank Black from Murrow High School and I have an appointment with Mr. Morgan. Yes, ma’am, that’s me. I want to know everything there is to know about being a pilot. What airports does Pan Am fly to? What does a pilot make in a year? And who tells them where they’re gonna fly to? What does it mean when one pilot says to another: ‘what kind of equipment are you on?’ And what about those I’D badges that I’ve seen pilots wear? Oh. Sir, do you think I can make a copy of this to put into my article? Aw, thanks! And what about your I.D. badge? You have an extra one I could borrow?” — Frank Abagnale
“I’m calling about a uniform. Thank you. Hi. I’m a co-pilot based out of San Francisco. I flew a flight into New York last night but the problem is I’m headed out to, uh, Paris in three hours. I sent my uniform to be cleaned through the hotel and I… I guess they must have lost it. I’m a co-pilot. How would you feel if you, uh, lost your uniform first week on the job. Great. I’ll, uh, I’ll write you a check. Even better. Dead Dad: you always told me that an honest man has nothing to fear. So I’m trying my best not to be afraid. I’m sorry I ran away, but you don’t have to worry. I’m gonna get it all back now, Daddy. I promise. I’m going to get it all back. I sure am, little lady. What’s your name? Celine, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I always do. Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you, John. I’ll be back again. Uh, no, I’ve been primarily based on the West Coast. Is it all right if I write you a check for the room? Great. Uh, I was also wondering if I could write you a personal check? Did you say $300 for a payroll check?” — Frank Abagnale
“Dear Dad: I’ve decided to become a pilot for Pan American Airways, the most trusted name in the skies. They’ve accepted me into their training program and told me that if I work hard, I should earn my wings real soon. Please get in touch with Joanna Carlton from the tenth grade. Tell her I’m sorry that I could not take her to the Junior Prom. Love, your son, Frank. Hello, how are you? I have a payroll check here I’d like to cash. Uh, excuse me. I’m sure you hear this all the time, but you have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. The airport? Who cashes checks at the airport? Hello. What? Yes. Yeah, I’m the deadhead. Here you go. You know, it’s been a while since I’ve done this. Which one’s the jump seat again?” — Frank Abagnale
“Frank Taylor, Pan Am. Thanks for giving me a lift, boys. Uh, 707. Uh, I’m jumping puddles for the next few months, trying to earn my keep running leapfrogs for the weak and weary. Thank you. Milk? Dear Dad: today was graduation. I am now a co-pilot earning $1,400 a month plus benefits, and the best part is they tell me my family can fly for free. So tell Mom to pack her bags and buy a new swimsuit, because I’m taking us all to Hawaii for Christmas. I love you, Dad. Aloha, Frank. Hello. Marci , did you drop this? Must’ve slipped right off your neck. I want to tell you something, Marci. This is by far… …the best date I have ever been on.” — Frank Abagnale
“My name is Frank Taylor. I’m a co-pilot for Pan Am. I’d like to cash this check here, and then I’d like to take you out for a steak dinner. And where are these numbers? Right there? So where do the checks get routed to?” — Frank Abagnale
“Daddy! What do you think? Sit down. So, Dad… Daddy, have you gotten the postcards? No, no, Dad, th-that’s a chilled salad fork. It’s a fancy restaurant, you know. Well, here… I-I got you something. Open it. You know what those are, right? Those are the keys to a 1965 Cadillac DeVille convertible. Brand-new, Dad. Red with white interior, split seats, air conditioning, the works. Yeah. I’m giving you a Cadillac. Dad, sh-she’s parked downstairs. When we’re done eating lunch, why don’t you drive on over to Mom’s house, pick her up, take a little joyride? All right. I have plenty of money. You know, if you ever, ever need anything… no, I’m not… I’m not worried. You’re that second mouse. I went by the store today. I understand, I… have you told Ma? Dad? Daddy, out of all those men, you were the one that took her home, remember that. Montrichard, Dad. She’s your wife. It’s not what you think. I’m just a co-pilot. Dad, nobody’s staring at me. Los An… Hollywood.” — Frank Abagnale
“Hey, Mr. Murphy, how are you? Yeah, it’s Frank. How’s the knee? Take care. Oh, that’s the new IBM Selectric. You can change the print type in 5 seconds. Just pop out the ball. You know, he’s got over 200 checks here, a gallon of India ink… even has little payroll envelopes addressed to himself from Pan Am. Relax. You’re late. My name’s Allen, Barry Allen. United States Secret Service. Your boy just tried to jump out the window. My partner has him in custody downstairs. You think the FBI are the only ones on this guy? Come on, he’s dabbling in government checks here. We’ve been following a paper trail on this guy for months now. Hey, you mind taking that gun out of my face? I mean, it makes me nervous. Yeah, sure. Take my whole wallet. You want my gun, too? Come over her. Take my gun. Hey, hey, look, just do me a favor. Take a look outside. Look out the window. My partner’s walking him to the car as we speak. Look. Old guy almost pissed in his pants when I came through the door. He jumped right through the window into the hood of my car. Hey, Murph? Call the LAPD again. I don’t want people walking through my crime scene. Don’t worry about it. Well, what’s your name? Mind if I see some identification. You never can be too careful these days. Well, tough luck, Carl. Five minutes earlier, you would’ve landed yourself a pretty good collar. Sure thing. Just, uh, do me a favor and sit sight for a second while I get this evidence downstairs. I don’t want some maid walking through here and making the bed. LAPD should be here any sec. You hang onto it for a minute. I trust you.” — Frank Abagnale
“So, my next question is, when a pilot retires, uh, Pan Am sends them a check every single month? How much is that check for?” — Frank Abagnale
Carl Hanratty
“Hanratty. Carl Hanratty. I am Carl Hanratty. I represent the FBI from the United States of America. Yeah. I have orders to see the American prisoner, Abignale. Aw, Jesus. You know, I’ve got a little bit of a cold myself. I’m here to read the articles of extradition according to the European Court for Human Rights. Article One: extradition shall be granted in respect of offenses punishable under the laws… Frank, stop it. You don’t think actually you can fool me, do you? 16 pages to go. Stay with me. Article Two: If the request for extradition includes several separate offenses, each of which is punishable under the laws of the requesting party… each of which is punishable under the laws of the requesting party… Frank? Frank? Goddamn it! Get me a doctor in here! I need a doctor! Doctor! Now!”
“Don’t sweat it, Frank. We’re going to get you right to a doctor. Frank, if you can hear me, don’t worry. I’m going to take you home in the morning. Home in the morning, Frank. What are you doing? This man has to be on a plane for America. He has to see a doctor. I have worked too long, too hard for you to take this away from me. If he dies, I’m holding you responsible. Oh, Frank.”
“You can call him when we get to New York. We leave for the airport in seven hours. Until then, just sit there. Be quiet. It’s the best room the FBI can afford.”
“Our unknown subject is a paperhanger who started working on the East Coast. In the last few weeks, this unsub has developed a new form of check fraud which I’m calling the float. What he’s doing is, he’s opening the checking accounts at various banks, then changing the MICR ink routing numbers at the bottom of those checks. Next slide, please. Next slide, please. Agent Mullen. It should be the square button just there by the side. Thank you, Agent Mullen. This is a map of the 12 banks of the U.S. Federal Reserve. Slide. MICR scanners at every bank read these numbers at the bottom of a check, slide and then, ship that check off to its corresponding branch. The East Coast branches are numbered zero-one to zero-six. The central branch is zero-seven, zero-eight and so on, so forth. All of this was in the report I filed two days ago. If you change a zero-two to a one-two, that means that check, which was cashed in New York, it is rerouted all the way to the San Francisco Federal Branch. The bank doesn’t even know the check has bounced for two weeks, which means out unsub can stay in one place, paper the same city over and over again while his checks circle the country. Next slide.”
“Let me ask you a question, Mr. Amdursky. If you were having so much fun undercover, why did you transfer to bank fraud? What about you, Mr. Fox? Were you… punished for screwing up in the field? Well, that’s just great. I ask for a team and they drag the bottom of the Pacific. Does it bother you, Mr. Amdursky? Does it bother you, Mr. Fox? Well, would you like to hear me tell a joke? Knock, knock. Go fuck yourselves. No trouble. No trouble at all. We’ll just take this check and be on our way. Thank you. What are you saying, he’s still here? Thank you.”
“You just keep your eyes open, do your job and I’ll buy you both a Good Humor bar. It’s all right, ma’am. FBI. 201… 201, 201. FBI! FBI! Come out of the bathroom! Step out of the bathroom! Hands on your head. Put your hands on your head. Shut up! Put your hands on your head! Put your hands… hands on your head! Put it down! Drop it! I don’t know what you’re talking about. Let me see some credentials. I didn’t expect the Secret Service on this. Hanratty, Carl Hanratty. Ten seconds later, and you’d have been shot. Mind if I come downstairs with you? I-I got to take a look at this guy. Wait. Your wallet. Secret Service. Hey! Oh, goddamn it!”
“It was stupid. I made a stupid mistake. I can get this guy, Sean. The worst thing a paperhanger can do is show his face. I head his voice, Sean, I saw his face. There’s nothing for him to hide behind anymore. What type of position? Sean, would you like to hear me tell a joke? Knock, knock.”
Frank Abagnale Sr.
Best Actor in a Supporting Role
1 nomination: 2003
Outstanding Performance by a Male Actor in a Leading Role
1 win: 2003
“I stand here humbled by the presence of Mayor Robert Wagner… …and our club president, Jack Barnes. Most of all, I’m honored to see my loving wife Paula… and my son, Frank Jr. Frank… aw, stand up. Come on. …sitting in the front row. Two little mice fell in a bucket of cream. The first mouse quickly gave up and drowned. The second mouse… wouldn’t quit. He struggled so hard, that eventually he churned that cream into butter and crawled out. Gentlemen, as of this moment, I am that second mouse.”
“Like fun. Show him the dance you were doing when we met. The people in that little French village were so happy to see Americans, they decided to put on a show for us. They crammed 200 soldiers… …into that tiny social hall, and the first person to walk onstage is your mother, and she starts to dance. You know, it had been months since we’d even seen a woman, and here’s this blonde angle. And the men are literally holding their breath. And I turned to my buddies and I said… and I didn’t. I didn’t. No, no. It’s nothing. It’s nothing. Paula. Come on. Dance with me, Paula.”
“Frank! Wake up. Come on, let’s go! Get up, come on. Frank, wake up. You don’t have to go to school today. It’s okay. Do you have a black suit? We have a very important meeting in the city. Eat that. Come on, come on, eat. Ma’am, open up. Just open up, please! Open the door, please. It’s important. What’s your name, ma’am? That’s a pretty name. I’m in a bit of a fix. I need a suit for my kid. This is my son, Frank. He needs a black suit. There was a death in the family. My father, 85 years old, war hero. There’s a funeral this afternoon, military funeral, planes flying overhead, 21-gun salute. Frank needs to borrow a suit for a couple of hours. Darcy… Darcy, please. Come back. Darcy… is this yours? I just found it in the parking lot. It must’ve slipped right off your neck. Don’t hit the curb. Now get out, walk around the back and hold the door open for me. Okay, stop grinning. When I get inside, you go back to the front seat and wait. Even if a cop comes and writes you a ticket. You don’t move the car. You know the Yankees always win, Frank? No. It’s ’cause the other teams can’t stop starting at those damn pinstripes. Watch this. The manager of Chase Manhattan Bank is about to open the door for your father.”
“That’s a misunderstanding. I hired the wrong guy to do my books. A mistake, I… anybody could make it. I just need you guys to help me weather the storm. My store is a landmark in New Rochelle. I have customers all over New York. My bank went out of business. Banks like this one put them out of business. Now, I know I made a mistake, I admit that, but these people want blood. They want my store. They’ve threatened to put me in jail. This is America, right? I’m not a criminal. I’m a Medal of Honor winner, a lifetime member of the New Rochelle Rotary Club. All I’m asking is for you to help me beat these guys. You’re the largest bank in the world. Where’s the fu… whe… where’s the risk?”
“He didn’t take anything. We took him. He overpaid by $500. Come on, Frank. Let’s return the suit. This place is good. It’s small but, you know, it’s going to be a lot less work. A lot less work for you. Hi. Where’s your mother? What’s she gonna be, a shoe salesman at a centipede farm? What are you doing? For dinner? On my son’s 16th birthday? We’re not gonna eat pancakes. Come on, why are you looking at me like that? You thought I forgot? I opened a checking account in your name. I put $25 in the account so you can buy whatever you want. Don’t tell your mother. Yes, they all turned me down. Well, because one day, you’ll want something from these people. A house, a car. They have all the money. There’s 50 checks in there, Frank, which means, from this day on, you’re in their little club. You got that, you got it all. To the moon. To the moon.”
“Nothing’s gonna change. We’re still gonna see each other. Frank, just write down a name and this will all be over. It’s gonna be okay.”
“My son, the birdman. Some uniform, Frank. Nice. Of course. This fork is ice cold. What’s that? Are you giving me a Cadillac? Do you know what would happen if the IRS found out I was driving in a new coupe? I took the train here, Frank. I’m taking the train home. You worried? About me? You think I can’t buy my own car? Two mice fell in a bucket of cream, Frank. Which one am I? I had to close the store for a while. It’s all about timing, Frank. The goddamn government knows that. They hit you when you’re down. I wasn’t going to let them take it from me, so I just… …shut the doors myself, called their bluff. Sooner or later, they’ll forget about me. She’s so stubborn, your mother. Don’t worry. I’m not going to let her go without a fight. I been fighting for us… …since the day we… we met. 200 men, sitting in that tiny social hall, watching her dance. What was the name of that town? I didn’t speak a word of French, and six weeks later, she was my wi… my son bought me a Cadillac today. I think that calls for a toast. To the best damn pilot in the sky. You see these people staring at you? These are the most powerful people in New York City, and they keep peeking over their shoulders wondering where you’re going tonight. Where you going, Frank? Some place exotic? Just tell me where you’re going? Hollywood? The rest of us really are suckers.”
Paula Abagnale
“You’re a better dancer than your father, Frankie. The girls don;t know what they’re in for. Ah, who can remember? Oh, shit! Oh, shit, the rug! I can’t believe I did that. Oh, Frankie, get a towel. Whenever I dance for you, I get in trouble.”
“See that? It’s just a school. No different than Westbourne. Frankie, you don’t have to wear the uniform here. Why don’t you take off your jacket?”
“He what? Frankie. That’s all there is, two bedrooms. Frankie. You remember Dad’s friend? Jack Barnes? From the club. He came by looking for your father. I was giving him a tour of the apartment. Are you hungry, Frankie? I’ll make you a sandwich. Jack wanted to talk business with your father. He thinks we should get a lawyer and sue the government. That it’s not legal, what they’re doing to us. Why aren’t you saying anything? You’re not going to tell him, are you? That’s right. There’s nothing to tell. I’m going out for a few hours to visit some old friends from the tennis club, and when I get home, we’ll all have dinner together. Right? But you won’t say anything because it’s… it’s just silly, isn’t it? How could we sue anybody? Oh, do you need some money Frankie. A few dollars to buy some record albums? Here, take five dollars. Or-or ten.”
“You don’t have to be scared. I’m right here, Frank. I’ll always be here. But there are laws. Everything in this country has to be legal. So, what we need to do is make some decisions. This is what Mr. Kesner is here for. Nobody is fighting. Do you remember your grandma, Eve? She arrived this morning. Do you understand what we’re saying to you, Frank? Your father and I are getting a divorce. Stop it, please, Frank. Don’t interrupt. And there’s a blank space right here.”
Jack Barnes
“The New Rochelle Rotary Club has a history that goes back to 1919. In all those years, we’ve only seen a handful of deserving gentlemen inducted as lifetime members. It’s an honor that, uh, that has seen 57 names enshrined on the wall of honor, and tonight, we make it 58. So please stand as I present my very good friend, a man who keeps our pencils sharp and our pens in ink: Frank William Abagnale.”
“It’s very, uh, uh, spacious, Paula. So, Frank, you’re getting to look more like your old man every day. Thanks for the sandwich, Paula. I’ll see you later, eh? Oh. Well, thanks, Frank. Uh, that’s the President’s pin. I’d be in deep trouble if I lost that. I’ll see you all later, eh?”
New Rochelle / New York
“What? Gosh. We don’t open for half an hour! I’m sorry, we don’t open for half an hour. Darcy. I’m sorry, we don’t loan suits and we’re not open. Uh-uh.”
“Mr. Abagnale, um, we don’t usually loan money to people who have unresolved business with the IRS. Sir, you’re being investigated by the government for tax fraud. Well, you’re not a customer at Chase Manhattan. We don’t know you. I’m sure you’re bank in New Rochelle, they know you, they could help you out. It’s not question of winning and losing. It’s a question of risk.”
“Yes? You selling encyclopedias? Yeah, he looks like a substitute teacher. Chapter seven. Brad. They sent for me. They said they needed a sub for Roberta. I came all the way from-from Dixon. I’ll never come back to-to Bellarmine Jefferson again! You tell them not to call me! What do they think, it’s easy for a woman my age and all the money that it costs to travel? I tell you, they don’t give a damn.”
“Mr. and Mrs. Abagnale, this is not a question of your son’s attendance. I regret to inform you that, for the past week, Frank has been teaching Mrs. Glasser’s French class. Your son has been pretending to be a substitute teacher, lecturing the students, uh, giving out homework. Mrs. Glasser has been ill and there was some confusion with the real sub. Your son had a real teacher-parent conference yesterday and was planning a class field trip to a French bread factory in Trenton. Do you see the problem we have?”
“Mrs. Davenport, I have a note to miss fifth and sixth period today. Doctor’s appointment. One moment. I’ll be right with you. What? It’s… it’s a note from my mom. I have a doctor’s appointment.”
“Hey! Frank! Frank, calm down, will you? I’m Dick Kesner. Now, I want you to leave your things here and follow me into the next room, okay? They’re all waiting for you. Many times these decisions are left up to the courts, but that can be very expensive, Frank, people fighting over their children. Frank, you don’t have to read all of this. Most of it’s for your parents, boring adult business, but this paragraph right here, this is important because it states who you’re gonna live with after the divorce, whose custody you will be in. And I want you to go into the kitchen, sit at the table and put a name down. You can take as long as you want, but when you come back into this room, I want to see a name on that line. Your mother or your father. Just put the name there. It’s as simple as that. And don’t look so scared. It’s not a test. There’s no wrong answer.”
“That’ll be $3.50, sir. I don’t want to hear your story. This is two checks that bounced. You know how much trouble I’m in? What do I look like I was born yesterday? You’re a goddamn kid. Go home.”
“I’m sorry, but we’re not allowed to cash checks from other banks. How would we know if they were any good? Ashley. Is there something I can help you with, son? I’m sorry, but we are not allowed to take checks from people we don’t know. Pleasure to have you back, Captain Carlson. What do you think, Angelo? The tomatoes are ripe this afternoon. Well, what have we here? Can I have your autograph? You betcha. Can I have your autograph, too? You gonna be a pilot? All right, then. There you go. Work hard in school.”
“You look too young to be a pilot. Why so nervous? Relax. Pan Am’s got lots of uniforms. It’s gonna be $164. Sorry, no checks, no cash. You’ll have to fill in your employee I.D. number and then I’ll bill Pan Am. They’ll take it out of your next paycheck.”
“Are you a real live pilot? Celine. It’s a pleasure to meet you, too. That’s 50, 70, 80, 90, one hundred dollars. You have yourself a great time in Paris. Excuse me. I’m John Modiger. I manage this branch. I want to thank you for coming in and using our institution. Good. Have you stayed with us before? No problem, sir. For airline personnel, we cash personal checks up to $100. Payroll checks, we cash up to $300. Fine, thank you. Certainly. Yeah, I do get that all the time. How would you like it?”
“Oh, I’m sorry, sir. We won’t have any cash until the banks open in an hour, but, uh, I’m sure they can cash your check at the airport. Well, the airlines, sir. They’ve always taken care of their own.”
“Our next item up for bid is also from the Jersey Central Bank foreclosure. This is a MICR encoder, used to encode bank checks. Do I have an opening bid?”
Miami
“Welcome to Miami Mutual Bank. How may I help you?”
“And then we feed the checks into the MICR machine, which uses special ink to encode the account numbers on the bottom of the checks. They’re, um… right here. They’re called routing numbers. You know, I don’t exactly know. Nobody ever asked me that before.”
Pan Am Airways
“You’re the young man who’s writing the article for the school paper.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. Just take ’em one at a time. What aircraft you’re flying: DC-8, 707, Constellation. Well, every pilot has to have two things with him at all times: one is his airline personnel badge, looks just like this one here from Pan Am, the other one is their FAA license, and that looks just like this. Oh, Frank, you can have that one. It’s three years expired. Oh, no, I can’t help you there. Those are special-ordered from Polaroid. The only way to get one of those is to become a real live pilot for Pan American Airways.”
“Pan Am, may I help you? Hold for Purchasing. Purchasing. How can we help you? They lost a uniform. Happens all the time. Go down to the Well-Built Uniform Company. They’re our uniform supplier. I’ll tell Mr. Rosen you’re coming.”
“Hi. Are you deadheading? Are you my deadhead to Miami? You’re a little late, but the jump seat is open. Have a nice flight. Are you my deadhead? Frank, Captain Oliver. John Larkin, the co-pilot. Fred Tulley, flight engineer. Go ahead and take a seat, Frank. We’re about to push. What kind of equipment you on, DC-8? You turning around on the red eye? No shame in that. We all did it. Have a seat. Would you like a drink after takeoff? 80 knots. Check. V-one. Rotate. V-two. Positive rate. Gear up.”
“Hello, deadhead. Enjoying your free ride? No… no! No… yes, yes, yes, yes! Why are you stopping?”
“Uh, yeah, pension program sends a check and benefits. Uh, kid, I’m not really in the mood for this right now.”
FBI
“Uh, the remote thing is broken. You’ll have to do it by hand. You’ve gotta… this carousel doesn’t work. It’s a bad carousel you got there. Got to move it manually. Carl, for those of us who are unfamiliar with bank fraud, you mind telling us what the hell you’re talking about? You mean those numbers on the bottom of a check actually mean something? You know, you want to talk to my wife. She’s the one balances the checkbook at our house.”
“So, I got on this red dress and these high heels, right? And I got a bra, like, out here, okay? And I’m chasing these two Puerto Rican guys through the park. They got a suitcase filled with bank robbery loot. Okay, I’m screaming out, ‘FBI, freeze!’ And I’m reaching for my gun, but I can’t find it in the bra. I thought I was going to shoot my tits off. You know, that’s a funny story. People always laugh at that story. I didn’t transfer. I was censured and reassigned. It’s like being punished. I was punished. I screwed up in the field. Oh, no, no, no, I’ve never worked in the field before. I audited background investigations of Department if Justice clerical applicants. You mind if I ask you a question, Agent Hanratty? How come you’re so serious all the time? Yeah. Yeah, it does bother me. A little, I guess. Yeah. Yeah, we’d love to hear a joke from you. Who’s there?”
“Eyeball the back? This guy’s a goddamn paperhanger. He doesn’t even carry a gun. Why can’t we go with you?”
“Forget about it. There are hundreds of unknown subjects out there. I read the report. ‘Six feet tall, brown hair, 27 to 30 years of age, 160 pounds.’ This guy could be almost anybody. Just be careful. You got 12 years in. Nobody bothers you down on the first floor. You practically wrote the book on bank fraud. That’s the kind of thing that can make you section chief someday. Just don’t put yourself in this type of position. Position of being humiliated. Yeah, sure.”
French Police
“Han-an-an-ratty. You sit here. You do not open the door. You do not pass him… …anything through the hole. Yes. Washing off the lice. The doctor comes in tomorrow.”
Hollywood, California
“He cashed three checks. They all cleared. I was going to deposit this one today. I don’t want any trouble. Good. Because I don’t want my customers harassed. 201. Corner here. Oh, thanks, son. Some steps. Steps. Is that Frank? Hey, Frank, how are you? Come on, I’ll race you right now. Okay, Frank. Yeah.”
Talk Show
“Thank you very much and welcome to To Tell the Truth. Our first guest, he’s made a career out of being the most outrageous imposter that we’ve ever come across on this how and you’re going to see what I mean. Number One, what is your name, please? My name is Frank William Abagnale. Number Two? Number Three? My name is Frank William Abagnale. ‘From 1964 to 1967, I successfully impersonated on airline pilot for Pan Am Airways and I flew over two million miles for free. During that time, I was also the chief resident pediatrician at a Georgia hospital and an assistant attorney general for the State of Louisiana. By the time I was caught, I was considered the youngest and most daring con man in U.S. history. I had cashed almost $4 million in fraudulent checks in 26 foreign countries and all 50 states. And I did it all before my 19th birthday. My name is Frank William Abagnale.’ So, for the first time, he’s going to have to tell the truth and we’re going to start our questioning with Kitty.
“Thank you. Number One, why, with all your talent, and you’re obviously a very bright fellow, why didn’t you go in for a legitimate profession? It was really a question of dollars and cents. When I was young, I needed the money. I thought this list of careers was the easiest way to get it. I see. Number Two, I find this all very fascinating. Who was it that finally caught you?”
