Universal Pictures original film The Super Mario Bros. Movie was released digitally May 16th, 2023.
#SuperMarioBros has cleared $1.336B at the international box office.
rottentomatoes: 59%
metacritic: 46
imdb: 7.3
Super Mario
The Super Mario Brothers are plumbers working out of Brooklyn, New York.
“♪ Uh, we’re the Mario Brothers and plumbing’s our game ♪ We’re not like the others who get all the fame ♪ When your sink is in trouble, you can call us on the double ♪ We’re faster than the others ♪ You’ll be hooked on the brothers ♪ Huh! ♪” — Super Mario
“It’s-a me, a-Mario. Are you-a tired of a-paying too much for plumbing? Mamma mia! That’s why the Super Mario Brothers are here. A-to save Brooklyn. And-a your wallet. Forget-a the expensive a-plumbing companies a-where you’re just a face-a. With-a Super Mario Brothers-a, you’re family.” — Super Mario
“You were great. I am so glad we spent our life savings on this commercial. Uh, what about the accents? Is it… is it too much? Okay, I’m gonna trust you. Hey, Spike. Wow. Really? Say that again about my brother, and you’re gonna regret it.” — Super Mario
“Luigi, come on. You know, you can’t be scared all the time. Woo-hoo! No, we’re not. Come on, let’s go. This way. Move it up! Come on, Luigi. Pump those legs.” — Super Mario
“Very confident, sir. Wrench. Mm-hmm. And a first job complete. Hey! Hey there, pal. Mamma mia! Whew. No, he won’t. Whew. Uh, who’s a good puppy? Who’s a good boy? Found the problem.” — Super Mario
“Hey-o! So, uh… so everybody saw the commercial, then? And? Ugh. Mushrooms? What? It’s supposed to be funny. That’s right. You’ve got to have a trademark. Got to stand out. Dad, what do you think? Well, thanks, Dad. Thanks for your support.” — Super Mario
“It’s not just them. Our whole lives, everyone’s telling us we can’t do this, we can’t do that. I’m just sick and tired of feeling so small. Save Brooklyn! Luigi, this is our chance. Destiny is calling. What? No. Just come on.” — Super Mario
“They’re not even looking in the right place. Come on, Lu. We got to get to that pressure valve. Uh… come on. Whoa. What is this place? Looks like nobody’s been down here for years. Luigi? Luigi, are you in there? Luigi! What? Whoa. Luigi! Give me your hand! It’s all gonna be okay! I’m, telling you, nothing can hurt us as long as we’re together. Luigi!” — Super Mario
“That’s a little mushroom man. A little mushroom man talking to me. Uh, Mario. So this is, uh… this is… this is not a dream? Yes! Then it’s… this place is… mushrooms? Really? Now, that is a cruel twist of fate. Hello. Yeah, I’m actually looking for somebody. Uh, my brother, in fact. He looks exactly like me but tall and skinny and green. See, last time I saw him, he… he was falling through a pipe. It was foggy, and… and I believe there was lava. Bowser? Princess? Hang on, Luigi.” — Super Mario
“Here you go. Wait, up? Whoa. Okay, so these bricks are just floating here? Uh… oh. Oh, wow. Love these pi… huh? Oh, come on. Whoa! Oh, hey. I need to see the princess. It’s an emergency. Huh?” — Super Mario
“Princess! Princess. Hi… hey. Uh, me and my little brother Luigi, we-we fell down this pipe. And now he’s lost s-somewhere in the Dark Lands. Well, take me with you. You know what? Make fun of me all you want, but you are gonna help me find my brother. Please? Is that a yes?” — Super Mario
“That was amazing. Wait. How-how am I supposed to do that? Ugh. Really? Now, this has to be a mushroom? ‘Cause I just hate mushrooms and… okay, okay. Are you sure there’s not, like, a… ow. Oh, not cool. Uh… huh? Whoa-oh-oh! I’m tall. Oh, I got this. No problem. Woo-hoo! Great. Yes!” — Super Mario
“But I didn’t make it. How many tries did it take you? You got it right away, didn’t you? Okay, now you’re just trying to make me feel better. A little bit. Yeah.” — Super Mario
“Who? Me? Yes, a little. Uh… but are we? Mamma mia.” — Super Mario
“We’ve never been apart this long. You don’t seem like you’re from here. Really? Hey, maybe you’re from my world.” — Super Mario
“Eh… sure. How you doing? That gorilla’s wearing a sports coat.” — Super Mario
“We’re not leaving without your army. Well, do you have another way to save my brother? You, sir, have a deal. I’ll fight your son and win. All right.” — Super Mario
“You’re about to pick on someone your own size. Yeah… oh… oh! Not even close. It’s-a me. Oh, what? I’m a cat? Huh. I’m a cat. Meow. Had enough? I’ll take that a yes.” — Super Mario
“Hey. Huh. Well, never thought of that as a good thing. Thanks. I… really, though? Why would you do that? All right, giant monkey. Um, no one panic, but the road is about to end. Woo-hoo! What? No. We don’t drive on rainbows. No, no. They’re usually pets. Ah, come to Brooklyn. I’ll buy you a turtle. Just– I was trying to be nice. Split up! Whoa! Whoa.” — Super Mario
Princess Peach
“I will not let him hurt you. We are going to stop Bowser. I’m going to convince the great Kong army to help us. Together, we’ll annihilate that monster. I can convince him. I’ll leave for the Jungle Kingdom in the morning. Wait. Release him. Whoa. Are you… he’s a human!”
“I mean, you are a human, right? It’s just, you’re so small and… wait, wait, wait. Let-let’s go back. Where did you come from? Then it’s only a matter of time until he’s captured by Bowser. But you’re in luck. I’m on my way to stop him. This guy’s a lunatic, a psycho. He will eat you for breakfast. He won’t even notice it, probably, ’cause you’re very, very small. Well, okay. Let’s see what you’re made of. No, that’s a ‘let’s see what you’re made of.'”
“If you can finish this, you’re coming with me. Watch and learn. Hi-yah! With the Power-Ups. They give us special abilities. Go on. Eat it. Down the hatch. Yep, there it is, and all gone. And strong. And you can jump. Oh, yeah. When you get hit, you lose the power. Come on. Try again. Ooh.”
“Well, we have a long journey ahead of us, Mustache. You almost did. No one gets it right away. Oh, so many. I was not good at it. Worse than you. I got it right away, but I grew up here. No. No. Is it working?”
“They’re all counting on us. No pressure. My Toads, our days of terror are almost over. With the help of the Kong army, we will stop… he’s not important!”
“Nervous? You know this guy? A Toad brave enough to join me. Well, that settles it. You’re coming with us. Let’s move. Pretty incredible, huh? I’ll never let anyone ruin this.”
“Thinking about your brother? Don’t worry. We’re going to save him. I don’t know where I’m from. Yep. My earliest memory is arriving. I was so lucky they found me. They took me in. Raised me like one of their own. And when I was ready… …they made me their princess. There’s a huge universe out there with a lot of galaxies.”
“You ready? We are here to see the king. Great and mighty Cranky Kong… yes, Your Highness. Without your help, the Mushroom Kingdom will be annihilated. Because we have heart. And with your strength, we can win. That’s it? If the Mushroom Kingdom falls, the Jungle Kingdom is next. Give us a second. This is a really, really bad idea.”
“Oh! Get up, Mario! Mario! The box! He really does.”
“That was incredible. He kept beating you senseless… …and you just kept getting back up? You just don’t know when to quit. It’s a great thing.”
“We beat him there and ambush him.”
“To the Mushroom Kingdom and the biggest fight of our lives. Here we go! Is there anything like this in your world? Is there anything like this in your world? What are you gonna tell me next? That the turtles aren’t evil? No way. Maybe I will.”
“Guys, enough. It’s an ambush! Mario!”
Toad
“Do not touch that mushrooms! You’ll die! Oh, I’m sorry. That one’s perfectly fine. Pleased to meet you. I’m Toad. That hurt, right? Definitely not a dream. The Mushroom Kingdom! Uh, that is not good. Um, your brother has landed in the Dark Lands. They’re under… Bowser’s control. He’s the most evil, wretched creature alive. I’m taking you to see the princess. She can help you. She can do anything. Come on, Mario! Our big adventure begins now!”
“This way, Mario. The princess lives right on that hill. Excuse me, everybody. Coming through. Got a big adventure happening right now. Just clear a path for us. If I could just… excuse me. Excuse me, everybody! Coming through! This guy’s brother is going to die imminently! Out of the way, please! Just trying to clear a path. That’s all I’m doing. He’s gonna be fine. Chanterelle. Nice to see you, bud. And up we go.”
“Just pop in this pope, and we’re on our way. It’s the only way to fly, man. Whoo! Here we are. Palace doors. Bing, bang, boom. Come on! Pretty impressive, am I right? Okay, so they’re messing with you, and I don’t like it. What do you guys, um… what do you want to eat? Anything… anything your hearts desire. Go. I am ready to scramble it up.”
“We’re going on an adventure! Come on, guys! Hey, Mario. We’re best friends. Don’t worry. I will protect you. I fear nothing. I said we’re going on an adventure! Whoo!”
“What? Feel underdressed. Whoo!”
“Oh, my… okay. He looks adorable. Yes! That’s my best friend!”
“Yes, she would. I guarantee she would. I’m too cute to die! That is how you princess!”
Luigi
“And-a Luigi. Mamma mia! And-a Queens.”
“Oh, wow. I was great? Are you kidding me? You were great! That is not a commercial. That is cinema. Ah, great. Spike’s here. As a matter of fact, Spike, we have. Uh, yeah. Our mom called, and she said, ‘oh, boys, that’s the best commercial I’ve ever seen.’ And I said ‘thank you very much, mother. We’re very proud of it.’ So, boom!”
“Are you insane? He’s three times your size. Mm, you’d be surprised. Hello, Super Mario Brothers. Uh-huh. A drip in your faucet? That’s great! I mean, that’s-that’s great you called us, because we can be there and we can fix it right away. Okay. Mario, we got one! The Super Mario Brothers are in business! Oh, no. We’re gonna be late. Hey, wait up! Aah! Come on, Lu. Step on it. Here you go. Oh, Mario, what are you doing?”
“You can’t be in… whoa! My bad! Oh, I’m so s-sorry. So sorry. Oh, I’m trying. I’m trying. I got bad knees. Oh, wow. We have hit the big time.”
“Ma’am, I assure you, we don’t make messes. We fix ’em. Hey. Hey! Francis is here. Mario, do something! Uh, Mario? That hellhound is gonna escape! Hey, uh, Mario?”
“Hey-o! I like mushrooms. I’ll take it. Can someone pass the bread? Mm, I’m not sure they did, Ma.”
“Hey. Uh, you’re not bringing me down. You know what? What do they know, huh? Destiny Del Vecchio from high school?”
“You are not seriously considering… Mario! Mamma mia. I knew saving Brooklyn was a bad idea. Mario! How is this gonna be okay? Mario!”
“Mario? Mario? Where are you? Huh? Oh. Yes! You just got a-Luigi’d.”
“Uh, Luigi. Wow, uh… yay. No. No. Do you think I know every human being with a mustache wearing an identical outfit with a hat with the letter of his first name on it? Because I don’t. Stop! Stop, stop, stop, stop. I know him. Yes, I know him. Yeah, he’s my brother Mario, and he’s the best guy in the world. They do if they have good taste!”
“Where am I? How long you guys been in here? There’s got to be a way out of here.”
Donkey Kong
“I am DK. I’m Donkey Kong. Oh, yeah. Hi, Dad. Hi. Dad, wave back. What do you mean? They like it. It’s what they came here for. Dancing pecs. I don’t need anything special to break every bone in your tiny body! Is this what you came for? Hi, Dad! Love you! It is on like Donkey Kong! Had enough?”
“You got the cat box! Oh, my… oh! Oh, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Okay. Now you die. Not even… close.”
“I let him win, just for the record. You want to know why? It’s… mind you own business! That’s why!”
“I hate you. Dude, is this you flirting? This is painful. You are so embarrassing. A princess would never go out with you.”
“All right, all right.”
Kong Army
“Follow me. Hop in.”
“Oh, by all means, come in. So, I heard you want my army. What makes you think you’re worthy of fighting alongside the greatest army in the world? Okay, fine. No, that’s not it. The answer is no. Goodbye. Who is this guy? Oh, he makes me laugh. All right, tough guy. You want my army so badly, defeat my son in the Great Ring of Kong! Are you two done whispering? It’s a little rude. I’m sure you will.”
“Yeah! We love you! No, no. Don’t do that. Enough with the showboating. Okay, simmer down. I said simmer down! DK! DK! DK! That means you, Diddy Kong. D… sorry. Now, since I want this fight to last more than five seconds, I put Power-Ups around the arena. You’re welcome, Mario. Guess you’re not getting my army. We love you, DK! I guess he got the wrong mushroom. Aw!”
“Mario! Mario! Mario! Mario! Mario! Mario! Mario! Yeah, yeah. Mario! Mario!”
“Enough! Get inside. We’ve located Bowser’s ship. He’s gonna arrive at the Mushroom Kingdom by sundown. Lucky for you guys, I got a shortcut. Yeah, I know. That’s why we’re gonna need karts.”
“Well, what are you waiting for? Pick your karts. Yeah! Well, then you better step on the gas and buckle up. Defensive positions!”
Mario’s Family
“Ma, did you make these? Ah, good batch, eh? Why don’t you make it like this? Hey-o! Oh! It’s the Super Mario Brothers, from the TV. They give an Oscar for worst actors? Hey! What’d I do? Uh-huh. We seen it. I wouldn’t quit your day job. Oops! He already did. Well, I thought he weas incredible. It belongs in a movie theater. Everybody loves mushrooms, right? Yeah. Mario, seriously, what were you thinking with that commercial? Yeah, but what’s with the outfits? Plumbers wearing white gloves? Don’t listen to them. The world laughed at da Vinci, too. I think you’re nuts. You don’t leave a steady job for some crazy dream. And the worst part? You’re bringing your brother down with you. What’d I say?”
Spike
“Well, well, well, if it isn’t Brooklyn’s favorite failures, the Stupid Mario Brothers. Yeah. ‘It’s-a me!’ Whew, yeah. Tell me, have you even gotten one call since you left me to start your dumb company? Good luck running a business with this idiot. Oh, yeah? Get this through your tiny brain, Mario. You’re a joke. And you always will be.”
Bowser
“Open the gates or die. I do not. Ah. Ah. I’ve finally found it. And now no one can stop me!”
“My Army! Koopas. Goombas. Whatever those things are. After a year of searching for the Super Star, it is finally ours! I am now the most powerful turtle in the world! Soon, we will arrive at the Mushroom Kingdom. Where, after years of being sworn enemies, I will ask their princess to marry me in a fairy-tale wedding! Of course she hates me. But that makes me love her all the more. Her heart-shaped bangs, the way she floats in the breeze, her immovable tiara. And when she sees this star… oh, wedding bells. Then I will power up with this star and destroy the Mushroom Kingdom! Prepare yourselves for the best wedding ever. It’s gonna rock!”
“♪ Peach, you’re so cool ♪ And with my star we’re gonna rule ♪ Peach, understand ♪ I’m gonna love you till the very end ♪ Peaches, Peaches, Peaches, Peaches, Peaches ♪ Peaches, Peaches, Peaches, Peaches, Peaches ♪ I love you ♪ I love you ♪ Oh ♪ Peaches, Peaches… ♪”
“What? Sit. Jam with me. This, uh, human, where did he come from? Does the princess like him? I know that. I’m not threatened. Find out who he is and what they’re planning! Not yet. Pain is the best teacher.”
“Leave him to me. What is your name? Not sure if you know who I am, but I’m about to marry a princess and rule the world. But there’s one problem, Luigi. There’s a human traveling with my fiancée. Has a mustache, just like you. Do you know him? Ah, a tough one, I see. Maybe this will get you to talk. Do you know him?! Do princesses find him attractive? Get him out of my sight! We’ll see how tough this Mario is when he watches me kill his brother!”
“Princess Peach, here we are. I guess love really makes a guy come out of his shell. Let’s rule the world together forever. Will you marry me? What?! So, like, Peach was super impressed? Oh, they think they can surprise me, huh? Two can play at that game.”
Penguins
“Attack! That is but a taste of our fury. Do you yield? No.”
“Pay him no heed. He is cute, but he is… please! We are depressed enough! Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me.”
Koopas
“Behold! The king of the Koopas!”
“Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Eh? Yeah. Did he say marry their princess? Doesn’t she hate you? Well, what if she says no? Yeah!”
“Sire. A report from our intelligence. A mustachioed human has arrived in the Mushroom Kingdom. The princess has been training him. They are up to something, sire. We… aren’t sure. Oh, sire. Look in the mirror. You have nothing to worry about. I’m on it, sire. May I lift the cover?”
“We found him in the Dark Lands.”
“Oh, yes! We have found the princess and the mustachioed man. He has defeated Donkey Kong and won the Kong army. It appears so, yes. They are heading toward their secret passage.”
“Attack! Mario, you’re a dead man.”
Lumalee
“Home. In an insane world, it is the sane who is called crazy. Time, like hope, is an illusion. There is no escape. The only hope is the sweet relief of death.”
Mushroom Kingdom
“Morning. Does this thing work? Yes, works great. You just have to blow into it.”
“Hold it right there, you two. What princess? I’ve never heard of any princess. Oh, wait, I did. Our princess, though, is in another castle. OH, yeah. That’s right. You should try another castle, maybe. She ain’t in this one.”
“Hey! Intruder! Stop him! Intruder! Stop him! Stop him! Now! Stop him!”
“Council, your attention. Bowser has found the Super Star and is headed toward our kingdom. Its power will make him invincible. We will be destroyed. Princess, what are we gonna do? How? Look at us. We’re adorable. Their mad king doesn’t make alliances. The Kongs will never agree. Good luck, Princess, for all our sakes.”
“Huh? Uh, who’s he?”
Brooklyn
“Thank you, Super Mario Bros. It seems like the only thing you haven’t drained is my bank account.”
“Too much-a? It’s-a perfect. Wahoo!”
“Excuse you. Hey! Get off of there! Hey, we’re working here!”
“The drip is right upstairs at the end of the hall. Can you fix it? You’ll be careful about making a mess? That’s Francis. He likes you. Mama, mama, mama love ya, baby. Hmm? Hmm.”
“Thanks for tuning in to News Channel 4. A water main burst underground today, stopping subway service and flooding downtown Brooklyn. Everything is under control, I promise you. We are very close to fixing this. Out of the way! Go back! Somebody, help! Somebody save Brooklyn!”
“It’s more than the storm drains can handle. Come on! We got to pump it! I got this.”
